my confession on 14 June 2008.

in place of this post, it was supposed to be a lighthearted post of pics of my most memorable trip plus video of rendang part 2. however, too many things happened on 14 June 2008 that made me reflect quite a bit at the end of the day. those below are for personal reading and think out loud thoughts ba. blogs often reflect the happier side of people, yet where do ppl let their inner thoughts go?

lesson 1 learnt.
i wld go home earlier if i ever stayed out late, at least much earlier than the last bus. for the second time, i troubled someone to fetch me home past midnight. the feeling is quite terrible, a mixture of guilt, apologies and wrenching feeling because it troubles the person one is closest to. it becomes much worse when it takes the person to travel across the whole of singapore jus to pick me up. apologies are useless cos it can only be said after the act. hence, i promised, it will not happen again. twice, i wasn't scolded. twice, it made me feel worse.

the realization that i m a really stupid person, because my stupidity often lead to the troubling others plus it is really not worth it. friends will always be friends cos whether they really care about u is another thing. at least some or a few really do.

lesson 2 learnt.
have my own mind.

self confession.
for the whole day, i was holding back tears. i hate life where i talk so much about auditing stuff beyond working hrs. i'll stopped doing that cos it is not only boring others but myself too. a lack of sleep brought me to be so sian for the whole day and affecting others. (censored). (censored). wat a lousy person i feel i m today. perhaps i need to self reflect on myself more. i donno how to control. when i saw you, i felt jus like a little ger, breaking down. time to grow up and plan a little more of wat i wanna do in life.